relativistic

moving at an extremely high velocity.

From the Special Theory of Relativity published in 1905 by Albert Einstein and his expression e=mc^2.

Although this term is strictly a hyperbole, since only very small particles in lab accelerators can approach the speed of light, it's use can be an appropriate exaggeration in certain cases.

I just got passed by an R1, he was relativistic!

by paulvmunix July 21, 2008

moral relativist

A moral relativist is one with a snarky attitude and bloated sense of self-importance. They can be found loitering about college campus' for years on end in multiple graduate school programs. If you are unfortunate to have one in your freshman philosophy class they will ask "questions" that are not so carefully disguised claims of superiority over the professor and all other students. Often known to despise organized religion and wear anti-religious bigotry on his/her sleeve, while displaying outrage at all other forms of bigotry. They become loud and angry if you point out that such outrage ironically hinges on moral absolutism.

- There is no right and wrong, there is only perception of right and wrong.
- Is that so? Well you won't mind if I do this.
::smacks moral relativist in the mouth::
- OW! Why did you do that?
- I perceived it as the right thing to do during this conversation.

by Jan OLeary May 3, 2010

beverage relativist

A person who has loose standards regarding the naming and preparation of beverages.

The bartender, clearly a beverage relativist, served me Pepsi when I'd definitely asked for a Coke.

Beverage relativists may disagree, but it's clear that some varieties of punch are superior to others.

by drillvoice-now September 23, 2012

Relativistic Computing

The art of exploiting the freaky time and space distortions predicted by Einstein's Special Relativity to make computers do wild shit. The core idea: if you move a processor or memory at a significant fraction of light speed relative to another part of the system, time literally slows down for the fast-moving part (time dilation). This could let you perform ultra-fast calculations from a slower-moving observer's perspective or solve problems where synchronization is fucked by relativity.

Example: Imagine a financial trading AI hosted on a satellite in a super-fast orbit. From Earth's perspective, its clock ticks slower. It could run millions more simulated market scenarios in what feels like a blink of an eye down here, executing trades before its earthbound competitors even finish booting up. Alternatively, a "relativistic blockchain" where consensus is achieved by comparing timestamps from nodes moving at different velocities, making it unhackable unless you can mess with the fabric of spacetime itself. It's Relativistic Computing.

by Abzugal January 24, 2026

Relativistic Communication

Any method of sending information that has to account for the freaky rules of Einstein's relativity, where the order of events can be subjective and nothing can outrace light. It's not about FTL; it's about dealing with the mind-bending fact that due to time dilation and the relativity of simultaneity, "now" for you isn't "now" for someone moving at a different speed. This makes syncing up conversations across interstellar distances or near light-speed ships a total headache.

*Example: You're on a generation ship cruising at 90% light speed to Alpha Centauri. You send a video message back to Earth. For you, the trip takes a few years. But due to time dilation, decades pass on Earth before they receive it. Their reply takes decades to catch up to your moving ship. You might be dead by the time you get a response. The entire conversation is less a chat and more like sending cosmic voicemails into a time-warped void. GPS satellites already do baby versions of this, correcting their clocks for relativistic effects so your "Turn left" command isn't based on a skewed time signal.* It's relativistic communication.

by Abzugal January 24, 2026

Relativistic Travel

Getting from A to B at a high enough velocity that Einstein's Special Relativity stops being a math problem and becomes your travel agent. The key feature is time dilation: for the travelers moving at a substantial fraction of light speed, time passes slower than for the people they left behind. You can cross the galaxy within a human lifetime... but you'll return to a future where everyone you know is dust.

*Example: The classic Twin Paradox. One twin blasts off on a round-trip to a star 10 light-years away at 99% light speed. For her, the journey might take 15 years. She comes home only 15 years older. But on Earth, over 20 years have passed. Her stay-at-home brother is now older than her. This isn't sci-fi magic; it's a direct prediction of tested physics. Relativistic travel is the ultimate "you can't go home again" scenario, because home exists thousands of years in your future.*

by Abzugal January 24, 2026

Relativistic Engineering

The discipline of designing machines, structures, or systems that must operate under the extreme conditions of near-light-speed travel or in regions of intense gravitational fields where relativity is the dominant force. It’s mechanical engineering for a universe where mass increases with velocity, lengths contract, and synchronizing clocks is a philosophical nightmare. Forget steel and bolts; think about containing energies that warp local spacetime.

*Example: Designing the hull of a relativistic starship. At 0.9c, even a speck of interstellar dust hits with the energy of a nuclear bomb. Your shielding isn't just "strong metal"; it might involve creating a forward-facing plasma shield or using a projected magnetic field to ionize and deflect atoms. Also, your onboard computers have to be built from the ground up to handle their own internal signals experiencing time dilation relative to other parts of the ship. It's engineering where the textbook pages are stuck together with space-time curvature.* It's Relativistic Engineering.

by Abzugal January 24, 2026