schmuckaneers's definitions
pronounced "baa-lous" - a contraction of the words Butt and Callous. A term describing the desensitization of the butt and groin that comes with sitting on a bicycle seat for extended periods. Without a proper ballous, cycling for long durations becomes extremely painful.
Floyd: Man- those guys on the Tour De France are impressive. They can ride for hour after hour on those crazy hard seats!
Greg: I know, I wish I had a ballous like that- I was riding last weekend and after several hours, I hurt so bad I couldn't sit anymore, but my legs were too tired to stand- It was like some medieval torture device!
Greg: I know, I wish I had a ballous like that- I was riding last weekend and after several hours, I hurt so bad I couldn't sit anymore, but my legs were too tired to stand- It was like some medieval torture device!
by schmuckaneers July 21, 2009
Get the ballous mug.When someone has dreads, but they are balding as well. This invariably leads to a poor cosmetic outcome, the wearer usually looks like a washed up hippie yoga instructor.
Andy: Did you see Mike? I haven't seen him in a while, his dreads have really started turning into breads. It looks horrid.
Pok: Ouch-at some point, you gotta let go of Jamacia, and say hello to middle age.
Pok: Ouch-at some point, you gotta let go of Jamacia, and say hello to middle age.
by schmuckaneers August 25, 2009
Get the breads mug.South florida slang term referring to the withdrawal technique during sexual intercourse. Immediately prior to ejaculation, the male withdraws and "blows his load" over the female's mons pubis, the anatomical region directly above the vagina, covered in pubic hair unless the female has recently waxed.
Most commonly encountered when sexual relations are ongoing, but early enough in the relationship that the female has not been taking her birth control pills long enough.
Most commonly encountered when sexual relations are ongoing, but early enough in the relationship that the female has not been taking her birth control pills long enough.
Jason: Hey Kenny- how are things going with you and that girl Kathy?
Kenny: Pretty good- we've been slammin for a bit now- Still frosting the mons though.
Jason: Still waiting for the pill to kick in?
Kenny: Yup- only 1 more week to go
Kenny: Pretty good- we've been slammin for a bit now- Still frosting the mons though.
Jason: Still waiting for the pill to kick in?
Kenny: Yup- only 1 more week to go
by schmuckaneers June 23, 2009
Get the frosting the mons mug.When something is cheaply constructed, made in china 3 months ago, but is "aged" to look like a real antique. These items are easy to purchase at pier one or other mid to lower end "import" stores.
Colin: Hey did you see Dave's new place? He just got a bunch of stuff from that mall store that sells cheap imports.
Paul: I don't see why that guy thinks buying all those fauxtiques is gonna make his place look good. He has brass plated elephants for crying out loud.
Colin: I know, its horrible. It looks like the best western "safari experience" theme hotel.
Paul: I don't see why that guy thinks buying all those fauxtiques is gonna make his place look good. He has brass plated elephants for crying out loud.
Colin: I know, its horrible. It looks like the best western "safari experience" theme hotel.
by schmuckaneers June 29, 2009
Get the fauxtique mug.A recent conference on plastic surgery trends revealed a 44% rise in moob jobs between 2007 and 2008 making it the fifth most popular plastic surgery for men in england.
by schmuckaneers September 19, 2009
Get the moob job mug.Ben: I am so sick of Tracy, its always something with her. "Did you get the report done yet? Does it always have to be so cold in here? I am having work issues with Margie that you need to fix."
Tom: I really hate obnoxious compulsive people too. We should move them all to an island somewhere.
Tom: I really hate obnoxious compulsive people too. We should move them all to an island somewhere.
by schmuckaneers September 26, 2009
Get the obnoxious compulsive mug.Aka: Goatee; A pattern of facial hair on a homosexual male, forming a circular targetoid shape around the mouth. Origin in key west in the late 80's.
Mahal: Hey greg, you know sandy and her cousin kenny?
Greg: She has a lot of cousins- which one is he?
Mahal: He's that 40 year old dude with the old used corvette and a key west bullseye.
Greg: Oh yeah- that guy- I know exactly who you are talking about.
Greg: She has a lot of cousins- which one is he?
Mahal: He's that 40 year old dude with the old used corvette and a key west bullseye.
Greg: Oh yeah- that guy- I know exactly who you are talking about.
by schmuckaneers June 6, 2009
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