chadsuperhero's definitions

jizno's

Like Quizno's but with an extra special ingredient in the mayonnaise.

I stopped off for a sandwich at Quizno's but the distinct aftertaste of semen makes me suspect that it may have actually been a Jizno's.

by chadsuperhero December 5, 2013

Victoria's Secretions

When you ooze girl-juices all over your pair of overpriced panties.

Samantha got dressed to the nines --fancy new lingerie and all--for her big date with a hot new stud, but after spending 10 minutes with him, she was so turned on that she completely soiled her $40 pair of panties with her Victoria's Secretions.

by chadsuperhero December 6, 2013

Superman

First and greatest of superheroes, Superman has been going strong for 75 years and counting and has paved the way for all superheroes that have come since. Possessing both epic ability and epic virtue, Superman defines what it means to be super and inspires us all to be better versions of ourselves.

Superman flies high and prevails against evil with wisdom and might.

by chadsuperhero December 6, 2013

Hairy Ass Truman

What we sometimes called our miniature schnauzer when I was growing up. An all-around hilarious pet name for any dog with a medium- or long-haired coat.

Hey, there, Hairy Ass Truman. Sit. Now roll over. Now shake. Good boy! Here's a Snausage!

by chadsuperhero December 6, 2013

designer dog

A hybrid-breed dog that is bred for the express purpose of combining the traits of the two parent breeds, as opposed to the accidental or incidental crossing of two pure-breed dogs. A designer dog is not quite pure-bred and not quite a mutt. The popularity of various designer dog breeds over the past 25 years has been exploited by many backyard breeders, most of whom are unfortunately not seriously committed to the physical and psychological welfare of the animals they produce. In spite of this, designer dogs often make ideal animal companions for a variety of unique home and family settings. Designer dog breeds are typically referred to by clever names likes labradoodle (Labrador-poodle) and chiweenie (chihuahua-dachshund.)

My designer dog Tippy is a chiweenie whose unique constitution and temperament is the result of combining some of the best features of the chihuahua and dachshund breeds.

by chadsuperhero December 6, 2013

deck the balls

1) To festoon one's testicles with colored lights, evergreen garlands, and tiny Christmas ornaments

2) To punch Santa Claus in the nuts for shortchanging you last Christmas

1) I wanted to make my girlfriend feel merry in the bedroom this Christmas so I decided to deck the balls.

2) In spite of being a good boy, Santa gave me nothing but a pack of underwear last Christmas, so this year I'm gonna wait in ambush in front of the fireplace so that I can deck the balls.

by chadsuperhero December 9, 2013

Angie's list

A compilation of names and reviews of everyone that Angie has had sex with. It's a REALLY long list, containing over 500 terabytes of data even when rendered in simple text only. Angie is a consummate whore of a housewife, who like most other uppity white bitches, likes to squander her overworked husband's money having a different room of the house remodelled every other week. Also, she has sex with the contractors and then rates their "performance" online. If you can't satisfy her voracious sexual appetites, she will put you out of business by giving you a terrible review.

I need a hot contractor with hard-working hands and a big tool to service me, and by "service me" I of course mean to remodel the guest bathroom. Maybe I can find someone to handle the job on Angie's list.

by chadsuperhero December 12, 2013