JamesBeam's definitions

MLS

An acronym for Major League Soccer, the only professional soccer league in the U.S.

Not the first attempt to make soccer popular in the United States. Perhaps not the last, either, due to Americans loving to make money, and soccer being the most popular sport in the entire world... even though only the Americans call it soccer.

Nigel: I say, Paddy, I do believe this looks like an American MLS match on satellite.

Paddy: That league isn't fit ta wipe my arse with. Also why would an Irish and English lad hang out? Get out of me flat!

by JamesBeam February 7, 2010

WWJT

What Would Jesus Tweet?

...He wouldn't, dumbass. That's the joke.

Bob: I'm thinking of getting a Twitter account.

Frank: WWJT?

Bob: I don't get it.

by JamesBeam April 3, 2010

Italian Job

Theft. So named for the 1969 Michael Caine movie, remade in 2003 with flavor-of-the-month "Marky" Mark Wahlberg. The word "job" at the end of it gives it obvious sexual connotations, but as the 1969 film is generally regarded to be a classic, the illegal implications are unavoidable.

John:
What up, dawg. You hook up with that shorty last night?

Dave:
Ah, man. We went back to my place, right? She did me on the couch, then did a little somethin' else back in the bedroom. And then.... she gave me an Italian Job.

John:
She... what? She used marinara sauce or somethin'?

Dave:
Naw, man... when I woke up, she was gone, and had STOLEN ALL MY SHIT.

by JamesBeam March 3, 2010

mob up

To add members to, or become a member of, someone else's "mafia."

Originally just shorthand for joining/asking someone to join you in Mafia Wars, it now includes real life situations.

(1) Bob: Mob up! [e-mail]

(2) Carl: Yo, those four guys have been messin' with us all night.

Dave: Well there's only the two of us, so if you wanna take 'em on, we're gonna have to mob up.

by JamesBeam March 12, 2010

molesbian

mo-LEZ-bee-uhn

(1) A sexually aggressive lesbian. A lesbian who makes unwanted sexual advances.

(2) A female mole which is also gay.

(1) Candy: I didn't wanna say anything, but... is Mandy gay?
Andy: Uh, yeah. Duh.
Candy: OMG. That's cool if she is, but I'm totally not, and she was grabbing my butt all night.
Andy: Ohh.... right. Sorry. She's also a molesbian.

(2) Freddy: Aww, you have two pet moles! How cute!
Teddy: I think we can all see where this is going.

by JamesBeam December 30, 2009

C-USA

An abbreviation for Conference USA. Still a mouthful to say, because the creators of the conference gave it such a stupid name.

Ed: You know, it takes just as long to say C-USA as it does Conference USA. Why couldn't they have a one- or two-syllable name like EVERY OTHER freaking NCAA conference?
Ted: A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.
Ed: You are so freaking weird, dude.

by JamesBeam December 4, 2009

Hashtagging

Hashtagging (v.) The act of having sex while smoking hash. Derived from "to tag" meaning, "To have sex with," and "hash" meaning "hash."

"We were bored & nothing was on TV, so Becky and I spent the evening #hashtagging

by JamesBeam October 17, 2010