by FlamboyantFudgeFelon March 16, 2022
Get the fudge felon mug.A colloquial term for an arborist from upstate NY or other back woods place who employs felons, particularly, registered sex offenders.
He first verifies that they are indeed registered sex offenders - or at a minimum convicted felon - and then he gives them unsupervised access to chainsaws and wood chippers. Sometimes accidents happen and there end up fewer felons than they started with, so it's not all bad.
Other times - well, felons with chainsaw... The possibilities are endless, and some aren't so great.
He first verifies that they are indeed registered sex offenders - or at a minimum convicted felon - and then he gives them unsupervised access to chainsaws and wood chippers. Sometimes accidents happen and there end up fewer felons than they started with, so it's not all bad.
Other times - well, felons with chainsaw... The possibilities are endless, and some aren't so great.
Bro "Brah, where can I get a job? I just I'm on parole, so nobody's gonna hire me."
Brah "Bro, go work for Felon's Tree Removal. They'll hire ya. They literally only hire felons."
Bro "Nah, Bra, they won't let me do anything. I'm a felon."
Bra "The hell they won't! You'll get your own chainsaw, wood chipper, shit, you'll probably get your own shotgun to protect you from choopacobras and parole officers."
Brah "Bro, go work for Felon's Tree Removal. They'll hire ya. They literally only hire felons."
Bro "Nah, Bra, they won't let me do anything. I'm a felon."
Bra "The hell they won't! You'll get your own chainsaw, wood chipper, shit, you'll probably get your own shotgun to protect you from choopacobras and parole officers."
by Double take July 10, 2025
Get the Felon's Tree Removal mug.An arborist company that hires felons to come to your house and trim your bushes. They charge extra to cut trees but will trim your bush for free.
Becky "I was going to hire Felons Tree Removal to trim the trees at my house. You think they're any good?"
Lateesha "Bitch, I don need no felons trimin' my bush!"
Lateesha "Bitch, I don need no felons trimin' my bush!"
by SuperWordNerd July 10, 2025
Get the Felons Tree Removal mug.A tree trimming service from Chazy NY who hires felons - preferably registered sex offenders - to trim your bushes and peep in your windows.
Felon's Tree Removal does a great job as long as you don't mind rapists and murders peeping in your windows and casing the joint.
by Read it! July 14, 2025
Get the Felon's Tree Removal mug.a melon felon is a black person often a slave who ate melons and fried chicken therefore melon felon.
by melon felonater. September 7, 2025
Get the melon felon mug.often a black person who blends in with the night because of their extreme melanin so they become a melanin felon.
by melon felonater. September 7, 2025
Get the melanin felon mug.I'm not a felon. You can't just decide that I'm a felon. But I CAN JUST DECIDE TO STAB THE NEXT KID I GET WITHIN ARMS REACH OF. If you are a liberal then you want to take the guns away from everyone, but you can, so you are settling for taking them away one at a time. You are the reason this is not a democracy. If you are a conservative then shitting out a kid gives you superordinate rights over the people around you and THIS IS A DELUSION. Your rights are the same as everyone else and your kids don't matter more than everyone else and they never will. The price of you trying to take out your child murder anxiety on me is going to me death.
Hym "I'm not a felon and if I am than so is the guy who possess more than 2.4 grams of Marijuana. You don't give a fuck about the law Jamhal. You're just covering your own ass as it relates to a cooperative violation of my rights. Full rights or child murder."
by Hym Iam August 5, 2024
Get the Felon mug.