John Racism, the inventor of racism, grew up in Mobile, Alabama, in the early 1700s. One day he stumbled across his very first black person and was fascinated at the pigment in their skin. From that day forward he dedicated his life to hating everyone based on the color of their skin and he made it known that in his mind, people with the same white skin as him, her higher in status then every other skin color. The people of his hometown all loved this idea due to them also having white skin. The word quickly spread amongst the white world and this amassed something of a cult following for John. To honor his name, the action of hating someone based off their color garnered his last name “Racism”. Although John may not have known it at the time, he would go on to have the biggest impact on this world, splitting it into a war of which race would end up on top.
Aaron: “Racism is such a bizarre concept, if it wasn’t for John Racism, I would have been felt more comfortable with the color of my skin”
Carlos: “Hell no! John Racism was a badass, I love being able to say racial slurs and feel better about myself because of my white skin!”
Carlos: “Hell no! John Racism was a badass, I love being able to say racial slurs and feel better about myself because of my white skin!”
by Saucy Spoon December 12, 2023
Get the John Racism mug.Dementia of a 93 year old at 18, professional Linda Manor resident, also Leo major is his great uncle or something like that. Loves to leave class for 10 minutes every day for a "special somebody "- Josh DeSimone. Number one Celtics enthusiast. Loves all red soccer teams (only Arsenal, Manchester United, Liverpool). Very mysterious (could be due to the dementia). Masterful at 0.5 photos.
Alex Major is angry at Billy for yelling at him for throwing mayo in the lunchroom. He is for real pulling an Alexander John Major.
by Jorge(Pronounced George) December 15, 2023
Get the Alexander John Major mug.Defined as the act of releasing one’s bowels in a manner where the shape of said excrement perfectly fits into the bottom of said toilet, plugging up the hole well enough to prevent successful flushing. Similar to the tale of the boy holding back a leaking wall with his thumb, this unintentionally shaped turd plug seats itself tight enough to hamper draining of thy marble throne.
Once I was finally able to push out that brown submarine from my ass, the dam turdpedo clogged my toilet so bad that my plumber said he doesn’t respond to JOHN THUMB service calls.
by Apologetic Shiek December 16, 2023
Get the John Thumb mug.Sweatpants John is what you call someone that is really good at a video game. They try so hard that they sweat. And they would then need to put Sweatpants on.
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A womanizer who calls himself an empath but does nothing to prove he knows how to put himself in someone else’s shoes. He loves doing anything he can to get attention from women regardless if he is dating one and will let them flirt with him and even flirt back just to feel something. He won’t do anything special for you and will constantly try to manipulate you and start problems and then act like the victim. He will string you along but do just enough to keep you interested in case his other options don’t work out. He also loves fetishizing goth girls (but he doesn’t want to date anyone who is anything different from the norm). He hangs around friends who will talk down on you and he will listen instead of defending you. He has lots of girl best friends who will also bash you if you’re dating him. If you guys ever have a fight, his first choice won’t be to fix things, but to ask out other girls. If you don't have the same religion as him and he loses interest he will start using that as an excuse as to why he can’t date you. He'll go on and on about how he doesn’t have any money to spend on a girlfriend but he will turn around and buy one of his girl best friends ice cream and take her out and spend money on himself. He will cheat on you multiple times and get sulky and not talk to you if you try to bring it up. He is still friends with ALL of his exes. And he loves to defend men on the internet who have done bad things. If you ever meet a John, run far far far away.
Girl: Who is that playing the guitar with all those girls around him?
Other girl: Ew, that’s John. Let’s go somewhere else
Other girl: Ew, that’s John. Let’s go somewhere else
by shutupmaggie August 29, 2023
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