Count Humpula

A man who enjoys having sexual intercourse with a woman during her menstrual cycle.

Count Humpula doesn't care if she's on her period. He'll hit it raw too.

by AmadeuS469 September 25, 2022

kiss count

The amount of people that have kissed you and or the amount of times you’ve been kissed.

EX// “Laura has a kiss count of 278 at the age of 16. What a whore.”

by Chipped_Flower October 5, 2022

Count Humpula

A man who enjoys having sexual intercourse with a woman who is actively menstruating.

Count Humpula doesn't care about Aunt Flo. He'll hit it raw.

by AmadeuS469 October 6, 2022

Ain't no count

Adjective phrase used to dismiss something as useless or woefully underperforming. Usually used to describe a lazy or incompetent worker or a sub-par piece of equipment.

"That hay hook ain't no count, there's one in the loft that's gotta better handle."

by Wildn May 20, 2022

God count

The number of a random thing that you will never know, only a god could know by watching

“I really wish I knew what my god count was for how many strangers found me attractive”

“Bro, you’re lucky if it’s 3”

by Night Monkey December 10, 2021

Nary a count

Old Southern slang describing something that is good or of high quality.

Were those biscuits and gravy any good? Yes, they were nary a count.

by Dig Bick McGee February 6, 2022

Close only counts in grenades

A saying that pisses me off. It comes from the fact that you don’t need to directly hit something with a grenade to blow it up. If this saying is true then light blue is a completely different color, not just a shade.

1. I was so close to getting an A!
2. Close only counts in grenades.
1. You are an asshole and probably can’t do any better than me.

by AAAAAAIDONTKNOW February 17, 2022