deuce and a hook

a fat chick weighing roughly two hundred and fifty pounds. deuce = 2, hook = half, times 100 is implied

Did you see that troll? She was easily a deuce and a hook.

by Cleatus Jenkins September 29, 2010

incendiary deuce

A bowel movement that leaves your asshole with a burning sensation. This condition may result from consumption of large quantities of sharp cheddar and crackers. There is no known cure, you just have to wait it out.

"Fuck, I just dropped a severe deuce."
"Severe? How so?"
"That shit was an incendiary deuce...my ass is on fire!"

by spodacus January 18, 2008

Code Deuce

The panic one feels post flush of a large bowel movement as the toilet water begins to rise.

The low flow toilet at work always puts me into code deuce the morning after taco night.

by JohnnyIntense March 6, 2009

deuce shoes

Shoes worn only when one drops a deuce in an office bathroom so co-workers do not recognize who occupies the stall

I put on my deuce shoes so the boss wouldn't talk to me while I was taking a crap.

by HogieSTL July 7, 2008

The King's Deuce

The perfect away-from-home shit.

When I walked into the bathroom at the office, the motion lights clicked on. I knew I was alone, and when I saw the seats up, I knew I was the first person to use the stalls since they had been cleaned the previous night. Beaming with anticipation, I put the seat down and settled into my throne for The King's Deuce.

by Halal Snackbar February 19, 2015

runny deuce

Diarrhea.

Dude, that gas station hot dog made for one runny deuce.

by gnstrlove April 18, 2016

Ace of Deuces

This is a guy who is very prolific in the John, lets everyone know about it, and actually takes a great deal of pride in it. He will usually drop a deuce at least 3 times during the workday, and tell at least 5 people about each one.

Sean just came over to tell me he took his 5th dump today. He must think he's the Ace of Deuces.

by walter_white_ August 24, 2012