absolute melon

An absolute melon is the person who can only say the most useless answers that contribute nothing the the conversation. They are always looking for attention and have IQ's lower than 4.

A: Says some dumb bullshit

B: You absolute melon

by waitwhatdoiputinhereagain August 18, 2023

Absolutely Nana

To peel somebody’s clothes off like a banana

Get on the bed so I can absolutely nana you

by The regger September 3, 2023

absolute dogwater

tell this to some random dude who literally sucks at aiming

you're absolute dogwater bro

by Skoonify October 1, 2023

Absolute true non-agony

The opposite of absolute true agony: when you take the AM GAMER drugs and the Coca-Cola is Espuma. COCA-COLA ESPUMA

Coca-Cola Espuma absolute true non-agony

by Gbungper October 1, 2023

Absolute unit

Someone who would make a great asset to a team because they are an awesome part by themselves. Like a space marine who has legendary qualities on their own but also work in a squad of other space marines. Also think about the movie Predator, that alien was from a planet of other predators that hunt together in the comics and was up against Arnie who was part of a commando squad out in the jungle but they went one to one which just goes to show what absolute units they are.

That guys an absolute unit, I want him on my team

by Jackiechanny October 2, 2023

absolute distress

Stomach issues. Usually diarrhea and/or vomiting

Person 1: hey you coming out tonight?
Person 2: no, I'm in absolute distress
Person 1: ah, that sucks. Feel better fam.

by YoyoMaFam July 26, 2022

Absolute Krusty

The act wherein the male ejaculates onto his partners hair while they sleep, resulting in a spiky and crispy hairdo that resembles the one worn by The Simpsons character Krusty The Clown.

"Doris looks rough today Keith, did you slip her an Absolute Krusty last night?.."

by Robbie Carton Comedian July 28, 2022