Top Urgent

Something may or may not be important, but you are feeling an unstoppable desire to showcase how much of an asshole you can be by making it everyone else's problem. However you lack the authority and balls to actually get people to take notice of the situation. This is when you whip out phrases like Top Urgent.
This is a favourite email subject line used by Karens complaining about a misspelling on an automated newsletter, or by parents around the world who have lived miserable lives themselves and are now living vicariously through their children and making their lives miserable as well.

Email subject line by Karen -

TOP URGENT - My child was not included in the Children With Birthdays this month calendar, even though her birthday is next month

by #NotYourTherapist August 17, 2024

Let Me Smack MY Meat Back On Top Of You...mhm

Let Me Smack MY Meat Back On Top Of You...mhm

Let Me Smack MY Meat Back On Top Of You...mhm

by Angel234IsTheDarkSeraphim March 26, 2025

Topping

The heterosexual practice of physically placing one's penis above another man's penis in a horizontal fashion, thereby "topping" him. This is straight because it shows you are "above" his gayety.

I was at Richard and Dave's house after their honeymoon. Richard wanted me to top him, so I stood facing him and placed my penis above his. While topping him, I came a straight line along his penis, which Dave snorted off. I love having straight friends!

by Handkerchief Steel March 27, 2025

Top Turkey

n. Imaginary military term for officer in charge or most senior officer

“That is the sorriest Close Order drill I can ever remember, boy!! Who leads this outfit? Who’s Top Turkey around here?”

by Corncakes March 29, 2025

Jetpack Top

A shorter-than-average gay man who prefers to top instead of bottom. Comes from spooning, where the short guy is the "big spoon" to a taller partner.

"Isn't jake 5'6"? I thought he was a bottom."
"No, he's a jetpack top."

by mmetz April 2, 2025

but top

argument used every time there's a discourse happening in viptwt and they take the opportunity to show their hate boner against him even when he has absolutely nothing to do with the drama. It's also used by VVIPS.

"but top said that..."
"but top did this..."
"but top stans are saying..."

by nhgcs April 9, 2025

Top Op

Your top opponent in any capacity (a foe, an enemy, or something you're just annoyed at - like work).

Ugh I can't believe my top op is gonna be at the party tonight. She's so snakey.

by smileyreilly123 May 2, 2025