If you were alive in the 80s and 90s, you enjoyed watching scrambled porn as a child.
You see, pornography used to be broadcast on a thing called "cable television." But, not just anyone could watch it. You had to pay extra for that. If you didn't, the pornographers would "scramble the signal" which resulted in the channel displaying trippy and occasionally beautiful colors garnished with a fleeting nipple or better. The audio was also scrambled, and sounded like aggressive static spiked with moans.
Boys, it was awesome, and not in an erotic way per se. It seems silly to reflect on it, on my self, to see it in writing. Nonetheless, scrambled porn represents was a more human, more authentic time. And, I, for one, am honored to bear this priceless 90s artifact unto our posterity.
You see, pornography used to be broadcast on a thing called "cable television." But, not just anyone could watch it. You had to pay extra for that. If you didn't, the pornographers would "scramble the signal" which resulted in the channel displaying trippy and occasionally beautiful colors garnished with a fleeting nipple or better. The audio was also scrambled, and sounded like aggressive static spiked with moans.
Boys, it was awesome, and not in an erotic way per se. It seems silly to reflect on it, on my self, to see it in writing. Nonetheless, scrambled porn represents was a more human, more authentic time. And, I, for one, am honored to bear this priceless 90s artifact unto our posterity.
I was having a sleepover at my buddy's house, but I had to go home so I could jerk-off because we were watching scrambled porn.
by BigMayMay August 4, 2024
Get the Scrambled Porn mug.Me: Have you ever masturbated to tranny porn?
My friend: WTF! NO!
Me: No? If it's a tranny and a chick having sex, it's not gay.
My friend: WTF! NO!
Me: No? If it's a tranny and a chick having sex, it's not gay.
by CK-HVACR August 11, 2024
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Males going through puberty will definitely watch porn just as females going through puberty will definitely have a period.
My mother asked me as a 14 year old boy at the dinner table, “You don’t watch porn do you, son?”
As I hesitated to respond, my father retorted, “Linda, porn for boys is like periods for girls.”
As I hesitated to respond, my father retorted, “Linda, porn for boys is like periods for girls.”
by Jose f August 14, 2024
Get the Porn for boys is like periods for girls mug.Very low quality streamed video captures, typically of a person or multiple people masturbating on an old school video sharing website. The choppiness and blurry vapor trails create a nauseating strobe-like effect. Very common when live personal video streaming was new, but the technology hadn't caught up yet.
by terrorint March 30, 2025
Get the Seizure Porn mug.Porn prominently featuring big penises or dildos, which is obviously not for straight men. Or, poorly made porn with unattractive women for gay men so they can maintain a cover story with their families if their families snoop on their computers.
by Publius0987 April 11, 2025
Get the Cover Porn mug.by UltimateDoge April 13, 2025
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