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Chopper Read

A true Australian icon and legend. An author, stand over man and intellectual. Cut his own ears off while in prison. A yuppies worst nightmare. Eric Banna portrayed him in the film "Chopper".
"Get them ears off."
"They had to re-stitch his anal webbing."
"Keithy seems to have done himself a mischief."
Chopper Read, Australia salutes you!
by Superbowl Xv April 9, 2018
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sick read

amazing read ( poker related ) " dam that was the sickest read i ever seen "
" dam that was the most sick read i ever seen "
by ordnas 23 March 29, 2018
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Drew Read

Drew Read is a very sweet and wonderful guy. He's cute charming and an absolite fucking idiot. He lacks common sense and is very creepy. He stalks girls and follows them to their house. After they get inside he waits until night and sneaks into a tree. He takes out his binoculars and watches them shower. He particularly likes girls with red hair.
"I saw someone follow me home last night!"
"Oh, that was definetly Drew Read."
by DogPoopWeiner December 1, 2021
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Jumble Reading

Reading the words of a sentence out of order

The dog jumped over the fox
Would be read as
Over dog fox the jumped the
Mark is jumble reading so it will take him a while to finish the chapter
by Philharmonic April 23, 2022
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Half Read

When someone only read something halfway. It's especially annoying during texting, leading to much confusion and miscommunication. Those jaded by this resort to phone calls for all major planning. This may result in a conflict with introverts who hate phone calls, and usually will not answer the phone, preferring to respond with a text. Thus a viscous cycle is born.
Bro #1: "Bro, where are you at?"
Bro #2: "At home chillin. What's up?"
Bro #1: "You're supposed to be picking me up for the game!"
Bro #2: *rereads texts* Damn, my bad bruh. I only half read."
by Yeti remains March 10, 2022
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read description

An easy way on eBay to say that whatever item you're selling is absolute dogshit, or has some sort of overwhelmingly huge flaw that would render it useless. e.g. "iPhone XR good condition READ DESCRIPTION" and in description, "BAD ESN" (this means you can't activate it, it's probably stolen).

Or a good one, is when they are retail demos and have SCREEN BURN-IN. Who the fuck wants to look at a burnt-in image?

Stolen shit usually is "read description" since they probably ripped it out of someone's hand.

Often, the seller will say, "re4d", "l00k", or some other bullshit to prevent you from subtracting their trash listing from the results. Also, same applies for "icl0ud", "cr4cked", and other things like "acc0unt". Really disingenuous stuff. Report them whenever you see them.
"iPhone XS MAX GOOD CONDITION READ DESCRIPTION"
Description: "... BAD ESN iCLOUD LOCKED"
by Doge 2.0 March 29, 2021
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Fart Reading

Commonly used online when someone claims to be a fast reader though they often misread or misunderstanding texts, failing to even see their own misspelling. First became common lingo on 4 chan /pol/.
Anon 1: You misread and turn things into something completely different
Anon 2: I just read fast, nothing wrong with fart reading.
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