by Ñüttŷ Pëêń May 13, 2020
Get the Garfield mug.Having sexual intercourse whilst consuming lasagna. Hence forth calling upon the Erdreich horror of the deep known as Garfield once you climax.
by No1Shagger June 14, 2020
Get the garfield style mug.Lady with Genital Warts
by sittinherebored November 24, 2021
Get the Lumpy Garfields mug.A really fat girl doing things she shouldn’t be.
by Thecrimsonprick May 22, 2023
Get the Garfield mug.A buff version of the lovable orange cat Garfield, that is known to many, including me, as the strong creator of our universe. Also has a 10-inch shlong.
Joanna was minding her own business, walking through the halls of a large university. She was heading to her dorm, passing her fellow students. On her way to her dorm, a fellow friend of Joanna's was walking the opposite way to her, and decided to stop her for a quick little chat.
"Oh, Joanna, I'm glad I ran into you!" He said to Joanna, happy to see her.
"Oh, hey! What is it you need?"
"I just wanted to show you something that will make you... lose yourself..." He pulled out his phone and entered his pin. Confused and worried, Joanna waddles over to his phone to see what he wanted to show her.
He tapped onto the Photos app, and told Joanna to close her eyes. Confused, she nodded and proceeded to cover her eyes with her hands.
A minute later, Joanna was told to uncover her eyes, and her eyes widened at the sight on the phone. It was a picture of a buff version of the lovable character Garfield, wearing nothing but red speedos doing their very best to cover up the majestic ginger rod that Garfield was packing.
"May I interest you in... Buff Garfield?"
After hearing what he said and looking at the picture, a warm liquid could be felt trying to gust its way towards Joanna's womanhood. "I- I- gotta go!" Panicked, she ran to the nearest bathroom. She slammed the cubical door shut, and pulled down her skirt to stare at the liquid that came out of her. "Ahhh! H-how did I manage to cum just by looking at a picture of Buff Garfield? That has to be impossible!"
"Oh, Joanna, I'm glad I ran into you!" He said to Joanna, happy to see her.
"Oh, hey! What is it you need?"
"I just wanted to show you something that will make you... lose yourself..." He pulled out his phone and entered his pin. Confused and worried, Joanna waddles over to his phone to see what he wanted to show her.
He tapped onto the Photos app, and told Joanna to close her eyes. Confused, she nodded and proceeded to cover her eyes with her hands.
A minute later, Joanna was told to uncover her eyes, and her eyes widened at the sight on the phone. It was a picture of a buff version of the lovable character Garfield, wearing nothing but red speedos doing their very best to cover up the majestic ginger rod that Garfield was packing.
"May I interest you in... Buff Garfield?"
After hearing what he said and looking at the picture, a warm liquid could be felt trying to gust its way towards Joanna's womanhood. "I- I- gotta go!" Panicked, she ran to the nearest bathroom. She slammed the cubical door shut, and pulled down her skirt to stare at the liquid that came out of her. "Ahhh! H-how did I manage to cum just by looking at a picture of Buff Garfield? That has to be impossible!"
by short_story_examples June 1, 2023
Get the Buff Garfield mug.by dfqovwfeabvefi March 3, 2023
Get the Garfield mug.He is all powerful.
You are not safe from his fat ass wrath.
To please him, make sure to bury lasagna under your shed/garage every month or so.
This keeps him from raining blood across our world, luckily, some dude is already doing it.
He will come if there is no lasagna, and he will NOT be happy.
You are not safe from his fat ass wrath.
To please him, make sure to bury lasagna under your shed/garage every month or so.
This keeps him from raining blood across our world, luckily, some dude is already doing it.
He will come if there is no lasagna, and he will NOT be happy.
Man 1: Oh shit...
Man 2: what?
Man 1: I forgot to sacrifice lasagna to garfield this month...
Man 2: YOU STUPID FUCKING MORON!! YOU'VE DOOMED US ALL!!
Man 2: what?
Man 1: I forgot to sacrifice lasagna to garfield this month...
Man 2: YOU STUPID FUCKING MORON!! YOU'VE DOOMED US ALL!!
by The Peter tower January 7, 2024
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