An almond boyfriend is a gymbro that has taken their protein intake and calorie count a little too far. They don't eat any flavourful food and all of their 'snacks' have added protein. This behaviour often affects their friends and partners, as going out for a meal or to the pub is as difficult as going out with a vegan. They are allergic to fun, won't eat any pasta, ice-cream, sweets and often, alcohol.
You can find snacks in their house such as: protein yoghurt, dried mango, psyllium husk powder, lentil crisps, nuts, lion's mane, skinny milk, cottage cheese, protein powder, graze oat bars, skyr, protein bars, overnight oats, protein cereal.
A typical Almond Boyfriend meal would consist of rice, boiled broccoli and no spice flesh colour chicken breast. No flavour must be tasted in the food.
You can find snacks in their house such as: protein yoghurt, dried mango, psyllium husk powder, lentil crisps, nuts, lion's mane, skinny milk, cottage cheese, protein powder, graze oat bars, skyr, protein bars, overnight oats, protein cereal.
A typical Almond Boyfriend meal would consist of rice, boiled broccoli and no spice flesh colour chicken breast. No flavour must be tasted in the food.
Some people are gluten free. Almond Boyfriends are fun free.
Ben doesn't like fizzy drinks, he's an Almond Boyfriend.
I watch a movie with my Almond Boyfriend – he didn't have any popcorn so we ate dried apricots.
Jack doesn't cook with any spice, I think he's an Almond Boyfriend.
Ben doesn't like fizzy drinks, he's an Almond Boyfriend.
I watch a movie with my Almond Boyfriend – he didn't have any popcorn so we ate dried apricots.
Jack doesn't cook with any spice, I think he's an Almond Boyfriend.
by pumpkinspicedemon November 29, 2024
Get the Almond Boyfriend mug.A retard "Well I see why..."
Hym "And I'm quoting her (by the way) 'MY boyfriend stole my car so...' So no. THIS is not why you're not fucking me you stupid bitch. THIS is not the thing. It's always 'MY boyfriend to stole car' and 'I'm molesting a retard at work' and 'MY husband slapped the absolute piss out of me' but THIS is where you draw the line? This? No. That isn't what's happening here. You are delusional."
Hym "And I'm quoting her (by the way) 'MY boyfriend stole my car so...' So no. THIS is not why you're not fucking me you stupid bitch. THIS is not the thing. It's always 'MY boyfriend to stole car' and 'I'm molesting a retard at work' and 'MY husband slapped the absolute piss out of me' but THIS is where you draw the line? This? No. That isn't what's happening here. You are delusional."
by Hym Iam December 31, 2024
Get the My Boyfriend Stole My Car mug.When everything starts going wrong whenever you're not with your boyfriend. For example, you cry over everything and small things bug you, you hate everything whenever he's not with you and your starting to hate life if it's without your boyfriend
Person 1: Oh my god why are you crying again?
Person 2: Its Post boyfriend depression. I miss my boyfriend!!!
Person 2: Its Post boyfriend depression. I miss my boyfriend!!!
by boyfriendswifey January 8, 2025
Get the Post boyfriend depression mug.Definition: the feeling of jealousy bc u need a bf (I wanna boyfriend)
Pronounced: ai wa na boi fre nd
Pronounced: ai wa na boi fre nd
by Im A lOnElY kId:( January 13, 2025
Get the I wanna boyfriend mug.doing things like sending cute pictures when you wear new outfits or swimsuits etc when you can’t show them in person.
Girl: Hey i got this new outfit im going to wear out youd love it.
Boy: gotta pay the long distance boyfriend tax and show me!
Boy: gotta pay the long distance boyfriend tax and show me!
by stern633 July 9, 2025
Get the Long Distance Boyfriend Tax mug.Everyday you should send your boyfriend at least one sexy picture of yourself just to remind him of how sexy you are
Boyfriend: says to girlfriend hey it national send a sexy picture to your boyfriend day
Girlfriend: oh ok send a sexy picture to
boyfriend
National send your boyfriend a sexy picture day
Girlfriend: oh ok send a sexy picture to
boyfriend
National send your boyfriend a sexy picture day
by National reoccurring days July 14, 2025
Get the National send your boyfriend a sexy picture day mug.A curious, driven guy who’s always juggling a million things..from drafting legal documents to building horror games to budgeting every Rupiah with weird excitement. He wakes up early, works hard, overthinks everything, and somehow still makes time to be thoughtful and sweet.
He dreams big (like becoming a Prosecutor/Judge big), but never forgets the little stuff.. like reminding his girlfriend she’s loved even when life gets busy. Smart, funny, kinda chaotic, and always planning something. The type of guy who’ll talk about law one second and ask you what makes life worth living the next.
If you know him, you know he’s one of a kind. If you don’t, you’re missing out.
He dreams big (like becoming a Prosecutor/Judge big), but never forgets the little stuff.. like reminding his girlfriend she’s loved even when life gets busy. Smart, funny, kinda chaotic, and always planning something. The type of guy who’ll talk about law one second and ask you what makes life worth living the next.
If you know him, you know he’s one of a kind. If you don’t, you’re missing out.
Stop looking for red flags, girl. Just find yourself an ara's boyfriend : like the one who meal preps, files trademarks, and still sends you voice notes at 11 PM saying he misses you.
by GuardianOfAngel July 19, 2025
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