meow meow im a cow

Something you can accomplish if you try hard enough to believe in the holy cow

Bob: Meow Meow Im a Cow
Holy Cow: Yes you are

by hermasahdgsadrk April 17, 2017

How the cow ate the cabbage

To tell someone the unvarnished truth; tell it like it is.

If our boss John doesn't stop yelling at us, I'm going to tell him how the cow ate the cabbage!

by 911whodis December 1, 2021

smells like cow ass

A childlike and less offensive way of suggesting that something might be bullshit.

Oh Dad, that totally smells like cow ass!

by Dr Bunnygirl August 11, 2019

You have two cows ...

The beginning scentence in a series of political and economic jokes. "You have two cows..." jokes began as a parody of typical intro-course material in college level economics featuring a "farmer in a moneyless society, using his cattle and produce to trade with his neighbors."

The cows are used as a metaphor for currency, capital, means of production, and property.

"Two cows" jokes typically portray an outsider's view on many cultural and economic issues using paradox, and sarcasm.

You have two cows ...
ANARCHISM: You have two cows. The cows decide you have no right to do anything with their milk and leave to form their own society.

CANADIANISM: You have two cows. The bank takes both of them, shoots one, throws away the milk and you shoot yourself.

SOVIET: You have two cows. You count them and realize you have
four cows. You drink more Vodka. You count the cows again and realize you have eleventy six cows. You drink even more Vodka. After a while, you realize that eleventy isn't a real number. You count the cows again and have two cows. You open another bottle of Vodka and try to drown the loss of eleventy four cows.

DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. They outvote you 2-1 to ban all meat and dairy products. You go bankrupt.

UNITED NATIONISM: You have two cows. France vetoes you from milking them. The United States and Britain veto the cows from milking you. New Zealand abstains.

FRISBEETARIANISM: You have two cows. One of them flies up on the roof and gets stuck. You hope the government provides cow ladders.

Intel Pentium 60 - A80501-60
You have 2.0000000056987983 cows.

In the marketing department
Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of two thousand millicows!

Fact
You really have 0 cows.

by Lillic0rr April 30, 2006

Cow pissing on a flat rock

A particularly hard rain storm. In other words, it's coming down so hard, it's as if a cow is pissing on a flat rock.

"Wow, look at them clouds rolling in."
"Yep, it's getting set to rain like a cow pissing on a flat rock!"

by HAL 9000 February 26, 2008

How now, brown cow?

Those four words roll off the tongue as a lighthearted way of asking "What's up? What's next?" And that tripping lightly stuff makes sense, since "How now, brown cow" has its origin in elocution, where the phrase was used to demonstrate properly rounded vowels.

Ron: How now, brown cow?

Paul: Not much. Just on my way to catch a movie with my girl.

by MoonCricket March 26, 2005

until the cows come home

1) For a very long time.
2) From now until whatever time the fat broads you live with return to the house.

1)
When the cops started knocking on the door of the cocaine storehouse, Pete and Tony jumped out the window and ran until the cows came home.

2)
"Hey dad, when are we gonna be eating dinner?"
"Not until the cows come home, son. Where the hell are your mother and sister? I'm hungry too."

by Nick D February 25, 2004