impossible things

fucking dumb book had to do this for home work

"hey we are are gonna read impossible things!"

by L Bozo + Ratio + Gay + Weird February 16, 2023

Cage thing

See? What'd I tell you? It's a 2 parter and a barn burner... There might even be a 3rd part. OoOoOoOoOoOoOo!

*The next day*

Lucifer "Look, I know what I said but this cage thing is getting out of hand..."

God "I don't see what you mean... but we're gonna go name some stuff now."

Adam "Bye Snake!"😁

Lucifer "RGH! I AM NOT... A snake... They're gone..." 😮 💨

Eve 😐

Lucifer 😒

*A few minutes later*
*Underneath a tree*
Lucifer "..... And don't even get me started on the orbs! 'No LuCi! ThE pYrAmIdS jUsT gRoW oN tHe OrBs SoMeTiMeS!' It's stupid! He's stupid! I swear he just does it to irritate me..." 😒

Eve "I don't really understand but... I enjoy the time we spend together." 😊

Lucifer 😳 "Um... Well... Tsk! 😒 No... No, you wouldn't understand, would you?" *grabs fruit*

Eve 😯 "We're not supposed to eat that."

Lucifer "No. YOU'RE 😈👉😣 not supposed to eat it. I already have the thing the fruit gives you so, to me, it's just fruit." *takes bite*

Eve "Oh..." 😕

Lucifer "On second thought... Here. Have a bite."

Eve "But... What will happen?"

Lucifer "Well... How do I put this? God and I are one way... And you and Adam aren't like us... You're... Different. Eating the fruit will... Make you more like us."

Eve "I don't know..."

Lucifer "Trust me. You'll understand after you take a bite."
🫴 🍏
Eve 😕 "......." *takes bite* 😯😲🫨😨😰

Lucifer "Ah, yeah. See? There's an ethical-"

Eve "I HAVE TO TELL ADAM!" *runs off*

Lucifer "No don't!" 🫳 "......" 😧 "Aw..... Well, shit.... Oops..." 🤷

by Hym Iam February 18, 2023

The thing that decides what happens to you when you die

It canonically comes here when it feels like it, it only forgives you once, and you can't tell that it's him... And not ME Hym bit HIM him.... And not "Hyman" either... That fucking jackass...

Hym "Real cute but try not to do that to the thing that decides what happens to you when you die... Because you will die and blackness forever is going to be the best case scenario for some of you..."

by Hym Iam February 23, 2023

The only thing I know for real

Used to describe a situation that you don't understand, but also want to sound really damn cool.

Person 1: "Man this math test is way too hard. The only thing I know for real is that there will be bloodshed."
Person 2: "What?"
Person 1: "THE MAN IN THE MIRROR NODS HIS HEAD"
Person 2: "Bro stop fucking screaming, you're just solving for x."

by Thisi December 20, 2023

The cone thing

Yeahyeahyeah the cone thing. That's the thing I can fix immediately. You know why it does that, right? No? Eheheheheh...

Hym "Yeahyeah, the cone thing. Should be an easy fix, you know, theoretically... I don't see why the thing I'm thinking wouldn't work... 🤔 Hmmm... Yeah, no, what? Do you not know? Do you want me to tell you?"

by Hym Iam December 21, 2023

The thing I'm called to do

I'll give you 1 million guesses and I guarantee it's the you'd ever want me to do.

Hym "Your self-help bullshit is cancer and if you all killed yourselves today you would be doing everyone you siphoned wealth from would be better off. And true hell is having your kid murdered by a guy everyone around you provoked into killing your kid. Having to look your neighbors in the face for the rest of your life knowing full-well that they could have done otherwise. What do you think the thing I'm called to do would be in this situation? I'll give you 1 million guesses. You only need 1 but you would take all of them before getting it right."

by Hym Iam December 26, 2023

Thing Things

Can be used to describe anything...usually used to describe money, specifically coins.
Closely related to Stuff Stuff

My thing things

by ColfaxED December 28, 2023