Skip to main content

five monkeys

The Way Things Are Done:

Start with 5 monkeys locked in a cage.

Hang a banana from the roof on a string and place a set of stairs under it.

Before long the monkeys will go to the stairs and start to climb toward the banana.

As soon as the first monkey touches the stairs, hose the other monkeys with cold water.

After a while another monkey makes an attempt with the same result. All the other are sprayed with cold water.

Pretty soon, when another monkey tries to climb the stairs, the other monkeys will try to prevent it.

Now, put away the cold water. Remove one monkey from the cage and replace it with a new one. The new monkey sees the banana and goes to climb the stairs. To his surprise and horror, all of the other monkeys attack him. After another attempt and attack, he knows that if he tries to climb the stairs, he will be assaulted.

Next, remove another of the original five monkeys and replace it with a new one. The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked. The previous newcomer takes part in the punishment with enthusiasm!

Likewise, replace a third original monkey with a new one, then a fourth, then the fifth. Every time the newest monkey takes to the stairs, he is attacked.

Most of the monkeys that are beating him have no idea why they were not permitted to climb the stairs or why they are participating in the beating of the newest monkey.

After replacing all the original monkeys, none of the remaining monkeys have ever been sprayed with cold water.

Nevertheless, no monkey ever again approaches the stairs to try for the banana.

Why not?

Because as far as they know that’s the way it’s always been done around here. And that, my friends, is how company policy begins.
Example of "five monkeys" in action:

Why? / Why not?

-because that's the way things are done around here.
by Ramon NZ November 3, 2008
mugGet the five monkeys mug.

Hive Five

Hitting a bees nest with an open fist.
Dave went to hive five the neighbors hornets nest.....didn't work out so well. He dead.
by Sister Christian March 11, 2011
mugGet the Hive Five mug.

Bear Five

The act of slapping two hands in the shape of bear claws together while emitting a "bear-like" sound. ie., "huhhhhhh", "ruahhhh", "growwwwl".
1) Joe: "Hey Ted, great game! Bear five up Top. Raowwwww"

2) Bill: "Hey dude, high five!"

Dude: "Screw that! It's bear five time."

Both: "Huahhhrowrr"
by BearFiveDude March 2, 2010
mugGet the Bear Five mug.

spock five

noun. A high five using Star Trek "Vulcan Salute" between two awesome people.
Person 1: Wow did you see those two, they just spock fived

Person 2: Gosh they are cool i wish i could be them!
by cnbear99 October 8, 2009
mugGet the spock five mug.

Window Five

When you are engaging in intercourse in front of a window and your friend is in a window adjacent from yours, and you both simultaneously "high five" your windows as if high fiving each other in person.
Dude I was doin Betty in the butt last night and Window Fived Mike across the way.
by TonyBruhh November 10, 2010
mugGet the Window Five mug.

Farmer Five

Television channels available over an antenna. Traditionally in the USA these are NBC, ABC, CBS, Fox, and PBS, which were the only TV channels available out in the country prior to DirecTV.
- Did you see what happened on Breaking Bad?
- No, sorry, I only get the Farmer Five.
by Damian Yerrick December 3, 2014
mugGet the Farmer Five mug.

Nordic Five

A hot ass group of sexy Nordics. The group includes Denmark ( Mathias Køhler),Sweden ( Berwald Oxenstierna), Norway ( Lukas Bondevik),Iceland ( Emil Steilsson), and Finland ( Tino Väinämöinen). They are all attractive as fuck and gay as all hell.
I swear the Nordic Five is getting hotter and gayer every season.
by ErenJäeger15 November 26, 2016
mugGet the Nordic Five mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email