Jesus Handles

The handles inside a car by the seats that be hung on to when swerving around tight corners and yelling "JESUS!"

Alice hung on with all her might to the Jesus Handles and yelled the accompanying expression as Luke took a tight corner.

by Indigo Starr March 5, 2010

Pulling a Jesus

When someone on chat says "BRB" and doesn't return for days.

Buddy: Hey bro, brb.
Friend: Aight, I'll be waiting
*3 days pass*
Buddy: Oh hey dude, i'm back, wassup?
Friend: DUDE, IT'S ALREADY THURSDAY, NICE JOB PULLING A JESUS!

by userbrn May 19, 2011

Jesus Roll

When a song, movie, or attractive person you meet at a bar all of the sudden goes all Churchy when you aren't expecting it. Like a Rick Roll, but the surprise is Jesus.

I was totally hitting it off with this girl, then she had to leave early to go to church. Jesus Rolled!

by Munche May 1, 2009

Sleeping With Jesus

Passing out drunk in a tub of water leaving potential for drowning and meeting Jesus

I was so drunk last night that I was sleeping with Jesus

by Christian88888 October 13, 2012

The Jesus Prayer

The Jesus Prayer is an invocation largely used by the Eastern Christian Church, particularly the Eastern Orthodox Church. It is prayed as, "Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner."

Neil recited the Jesus Prayer using his prayer beads.

by ohyeahpat August 1, 2012

Jesus Jenelle

1) a common phrase when you seen wit Kieffah
2) a phrase when Jenelle screws up and doesn't take care of her baby.
3) Said when change jar in thrown at Keiffah

"Jesus Jenelle I seen you with Kieffah"

" Have fun on the streets with your boyfrieeeeeeend"

"Jesus Jenelle that was my change jaaar, why did you do that?"

by makinithailondesehoes January 1, 2012

Jesus Troll

A person who sobers the mood of a post by tying the subject back to Jesus/God/Christianity. Can be completed with biblical quotes or an overall feeling of Christian guilt.

Steve: Check it out, I planked the water fountain!
Terry: That shit is so fucking stupid, man
John: We should all thank Him for having the full mobility of our bodies to be able to do such things. Some people don't have that luxury.
Steve: John, you're such a Jesus Troll.

by Jonnie Brasco July 11, 2011