Carpet crunchers

Toes that are immensely bigger than the average human's fingers and are able to claw their way into your carpet, through your floor, gripping your house foundation, hence the name carpet crunchers.

Extra 1: BE QUIET DON'T YOU HAVE TWO CARPET CRUNCHERS 3000??
Extra 2: HOW BOUT YOU LEAVE THEM ALONE OR THEYRE GONNA BECOME HUMAN CRUNCHERS

by I eat your toes for breakfast May 8, 2023

stinky carpet spider

When a bitch with crabs has smell pussy

“Hey bro, she has a stinky carpet spider, don’t mess with her”

by Carpetspiderluvr July 31, 2023

Carpet lightning

A spark of static electricity generated from walking across carpeting

Carpet lightning is quite a shocking experience.

by ABDL2023 July 31, 2023

Carpet Dealer

A guy with a lot of lesbian friends.

"Have you seen who Brian hangs out with? He's such a Carpet Dealer!"

by BlazinBananas August 13, 2023

Piss Carpet

piss carpet moment; intentionally doing something, whether it's buying an early access game, or perfoming a bug that can break the game (pissing on the carpet) and getting mad that its having early access issues, or breaks the game (mad that the carpet has piss on it).

There was this one guy, posted a clip where he put a sword in the floor in this game, and it spazzed and noclipped below the map, and told the devs about his piss carpet.

by rokavii August 17, 2023

Carpet Surfing

When a woman that identified as heterosexual decides to give cunnilingus to another women because she’s sick of dealing with men

Zack’s wife got fed up with his infidelity and selfishness, so she went out for drinks with the girls and ended up carpet surfing with Julie.

by Ralniv August 26, 2023

Carpet swimming

When your indoor pets scratch their nasty asshole on your carpet.

Forearms pulling while backlegs off the ground so b-hole is smack on carpet. Looks like pet is swimming when actually is just scratching or wiping its ass.

Oh fuck. Rover just went liquid and now he's carpet swimming across the living room!

by StinkyMinkey October 3, 2023