Jesus dick

Dick so good that it heals all of your ailments

Girl: I thought you weren't going out tonight because you had a headache

Friend: I wasn't but then I hit up Ryan... He got that Jesus dick

by Dagger23 March 11, 2014

bathtub jesus

Decorative lawn ornament, popular through much of New england, where an old cast-iron bathtub is buried standing up, halfway into the ground, and a statue of Jesus is placed inside. Frequently seen near or with a lawn ball. Associated with white trash.

I saw a great bathtub jesus in Pawtucket last week.

by bkdouble October 6, 2006

jesus year

The 33rd year of your life. Time to get moving and get things done (maybe).

Next year is my Jesus year, I better stop drinking.

by agill December 24, 2008

jackhammer jesus

a dildo in the shape of a crucifix

I found a jackhammer jesus in Kelly's pillowcase

by Big Bubba B April 28, 2004

stoner jesus

the jesus to the stoner. stoners worship him as if he were real and they pray until there is a great amount of marijuana

i cant go out tonite i have to pray to stoner jesus for some weed

by rainbowsandunicorns8492 August 10, 2006

Slim Jesus

- A fake "gangster" rapper.

- A way to say someone is fake as hell.

That boy a Slim Jesus lying about his hood.

by VailStraightliner December 7, 2016

Jesus joint

A marijuana cigarette rolled with Bible pages in lieu of joint papers.

"Hey, Caleb, we should roll a joint!"

"I wish we could, Brandon, but we don't have any papers."

"Wait! I have my bible! Let's roll a Jesus joint!"

"Oh joyous day! Our afternoon is saved! Quick, I'll race ya to 1st John!"

by brandonjamesrice November 18, 2009