Closet porn

1. Porn that is gay that someone tries to pass off as not being gay in order to try and convince themselves and others that they are straight.
2. Trap porn

Person 1: "Hey have you seen Jeff?"
Person 2: "Yeah, he's been spamming my chats with closet porn for the past couple of days trying to convince me that traps aren't gay."

by Stooooooooooooooooooooooooooop August 9, 2017

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Closet Vaxxer

A parent that vaccinates their children or child in secret out of fear of being mocked and shamed by anti-vaxxers.

Did you hear about old Lou Silinavich, I heard he was a closet vaxxer and his kids are actually vaccinated. We shouldn’t let little Bobby Joe & Sue Ellen play with his kids any longer.

by MahatmaJonny December 19, 2018

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Someone with the compulsive need to tug-it in the closet. Maybe due to a tramatic event of being walked in upon while giving his reliable pair the 1-2 polish and shine, (he wears sandals). There’s no shame, just more mess and not as much wiggle room as your traditional shower has to offer.

“I myself, am a closet tugger, the doors provide a nice secure barrier from the outside world during me time, and my girlfriends fuzzy scarves drape just low enough to tickle the tip.

“Dave is such a closet tugger! Look, he’s wearing crocs!”

by DrGreenT December 20, 2018

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closet cock

Someone who portrays false humility when in actuality, they are extremely cocky

“Linda you sang great!”
“No it was horrible, I’m alright, it was just a side stage gig, thanks though”
“Don’t be such a closet cock Linda I saw you hog the mic at sound check belting and screaming, showing off for no reason”

by Pseudos January 3, 2019

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