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contract lesbian

A contract lesbian is a celebrity, such as a musician or actress, who must act and date as if she is a lesbian for publicity. They are also usually not allowed to date men until their contract is up, to keep it from being found out that they're not really lesbian.
Lydia: Each girl in T.A.T.U. is a contract lesbian.
Brandon: What the hell is a contract lesbian?
Lydia: You know, they acted like lesbians 'cause it said they had to in their contract, just so "All The Things She Said" would get airplay.
Tony: So they're not really lesbians, but rather they just get paid to act like they are in public?
Lydia: Exactly.
Daniel: Damn.
by Quack Quack January 30, 2006
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Britney Spears

An artistically useless pop singer who relied on the "naughty Catholic schoolgirl" image to skyrocket her to fame, and even claimed to be virginal and pure, before going all slut on America and producing millions of pre-teen skanks. She is now married to America's number one wigger. (See Kevin Federline.)
Friend: Remember when we used to own Britney Spears dolls?
Me: Yeah, but then we got brains, cut off all the dolls' hair, and dismembered the damn things.
by Quack Quack May 25, 2006
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ho ho ho

Santa's laugh, also see Paris Hilton
Santa: Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!!!

Kandi: Omigod! It's Paris Hilton! See?
Me (pointing at Paris): Ho ho ho!!!
by Quack Quack July 21, 2008
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Mariah Carey

Best selling female artist, best selling over all artist of the '90s, possesses a five-octave vocal range, but is the biggest prima donna in the world; with her fake boobs, cheesy smile, and cutesy-this, innocent-that demeanor, it's as if she thinks she's still a teenager.
Brittany: That Mariah Carey can really sing!
Lydia: Yeah, but she's the biggest diva out there, she looks down on people, and she's totally fake.
by Quack Quack May 31, 2005
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A real Al Capone

A true, for real, 100% gansta. See Capone.
"Man, Tupac wasn't just the greatest rapper ever, he was a real Al Capone to boot."
by Quack Quack May 31, 2005
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304

Area code for the entire state of West Virginia.
"Hey, his number is 304-555-7864."
by Quack Quack July 15, 2008
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Kevin Federline

The man who was actually fuckin' pathetic enough to marry Britney Spears. Thinks he's gonna make fame for himself. This kills me. Hehehehe.
"Man, that Kevin Federline, what a fuckin' joke."
by Quack Quack May 31, 2005
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