Ben Frey's definitions

celebracy

The curious practice where a celebrity takes a vow of voluntary celibacy. Usually taken by brooding male rock stars like Rivers Cuomo and Morrissey.

I don't know why you'd practice celebracy when you could get any screaming teenage groupie you wanted.

by Ben Frey May 17, 2006

fear goggles

What you're looking through the morning after you wore beer goggles and had a one night stand.

I must have been pretty drunk last night, because the girl I woke up with looked totally awful through my fear goggles.

by Ben Frey May 17, 2006

progressive dinner

A group meal where each course is served at a different person's house or restaurant.

Last night we did a progressive dinner downtown, with appetizers at Ben Pao, salad at Weber Grill, steaks at Gibson's, and dessert at the Cheesecake Factory.

by Ben Frey May 25, 2006

Lincolnish

Possessing the qualities of truthiness, justice, and the Red state American way.

A word commonly used by neocon faux journalist Stephen Colbert to describe himself.

Stephen Colbert is Lincolnish.

by Ben Frey May 25, 2006

sargasm

Deriving far too much satisfaction from glibly berating another with sarcasm.

"Oh, thanks a lot for drinking my last beer! No, it's my fault... if I wanted it for myself, I shouldn't have put it in the fridge!"
"Dude, don't have a sargasm."

by Ben Frey May 26, 2006

Friendly Confines

Chicago phrase for the greatest ballpark in the world, Wrigley Field. Unfortunately not, by any stretch of the imagination, home to the greatest baseball team in the world. Coined by first baseman and coach Ernie Banks.

Win or lose, it's always a good afternoon at the Friendly Confines.

by Ben Frey June 11, 2006

red pony

Also called a snot rocket, the act of covering one nostril and blowing forcefully on the other to expel flotsam and jetsam from one's sinus cavity, usally in a public place. Named for a character in John Steinbeck's "The Red Pony" with a predilection for said disgusting affectation.

I didn't have any kleenex and didn't see anyone down the street, so I launched a red pony on the sidewalk before hopping on the bus.

by Ben Frey June 11, 2006